Looking to start 2017 with romance? It's always good luck to have a kiss at midnight on New Year's right? Here's 5 miscellaneous romance posts on Utica Craigslist you could choose from. 

WARNING- Some of these posts may be NSFW.

1) WARM OIL MASSAGE FOR FUN - m4w

Are you a fan of warm oil massages? If so, this could be your Prince Charming.

Searching for a woman --very -very busty and big hips to exchange warm oil massages... am clean,sexy,tan,good shape,and just want to do this for fun,so we can enjoy and relax,,if something more comes out of it,,who knows..maybe we could see each other often...ONLY IF YOU ARE SINCERE ABOUT MEETING PLEASE...games and foolish emails are not needed..you will not be disappointed..I can be avail anytime-divorced here-no drama on my end"

 

2) Sexy Feet - m4w (Syracuse)

Are you a woman who likes feet, and aren't grossed out by foot fungus? We may have the perfect gent for you. He's only looking for clean feet women though.

Looking for a younger woman with sexy feet who'd like to get them worshipped: massaged, toes sucked on, etc. You must have good hygiene and soft, sexy feet, and like getting them played with. I can give you whatever you want in return. If interested message me.

 

3) Wanted ! Cleaning lady - m4w

If you always wanted to play the role of a cleaning lady, and have a boss that is a dating partner, this may be the ad for you. It's pretty confusing in that he's looking for a worker, but wants a girl friend too.

My regular cleaning lady moved away, and I'm looking for someone to take her place. Please be single if possible, no drama please, and yes you really have to clean.

 

4) Hairy pits - m4w

Well, this is an interesting ad. Are you a woman who doesn't shave her armpits? This guy, really wants to meet you.

Attractive, active, fun, interesting guy here who loves natural women. I would love to find someone to connect with on all levels; emotional spiritual and physical. Love love love hairy women."

 

5) The 2nd law of thermodynamics says... - m4w

If you're looking for someone who uses big words, this may be the guy for you. His ad is poetry at its finest:

The 2nd law of thermodynamics says......you're supposed to share your hotness with me.

To be upfront, my wife is distant, and not physical. I get that she may not need that, and I don't expect someone to do something they don't want to do but tired of ignoring my physical side.

Are you committed to family/home responsibilities but might be interested in a mutually satisfying physical relationship? Nice looking guy here, many interests, loves the outdoors and would enjoy a walk with that special someone. Not wanting to change either of our present situations, send a note so we can catch up. Let's talk more."

 


BONUS VIDEO- SMASHING NEW YEAR

 

(POST INSPIRED BY 99.1 THE POINT)