Beyonce's Super Bowl performance was probably the closest thing we've had to a sexy Halftime show since Janet Jackson's wardrobe malfunction nine years ago. Yes, it's been that long.

So it's not surprising people are combing over video, trying to find some kind of wardrobe malfunction. Unfortunately for them, there wasn't one.

First off, Beyonce's top was kind of revealing and loose. But despite a slow-motion clip, there's ZERO EVIDENCE anything popped out.

Meanwhile, MediaTakeOut.com says Beyoncé showed too much crotch. But even their own close-up photos don't reveal anything.

Why are men so infatuated with women's breasts?  To spend hours slowing down video just to see a glimpse sounds a like a waste of time and a little desperate to me.  But that's just me.  Now, if it was Keith Urban's butt we were getting a glimpse of, that's a different story.

See Beyonce talk with Extra about her halftime performance.

Watch Beyonce's Super Bowl Halftime show.