Funny Thanksgiving Dinner Stories

A pregnant turkey on the dinner table? “Oops! I dropped the bird!” Keeping the cat away from the food. An Arnold Schwartzenegger Thanksgiving? A pumpkin pie to forget? There are as many great, humorous Thanksgiving dinner stories as there are Thanksgiving dinners. Check out these and more.

  One year at Thanksgiving my mom decided to play a trick.
She told my sister that she needed something from the store.
When my sister left, my mom took the turkey out of the oven, removed
the stuffing, stuffed a Cornish hen, and inserted it into the turkey, and
re-stuffed the turkey. She then placed the bird(s) back in the oven.
When it was time for dinner, my sister pulled the turkey out of the oven
and proceeded to remove the stuffing. When her serving spoon hit something,
she reached in and pulled out the little bird.
With a look of total shock on her face, my mother exclaimed, “Patricia,
you’ve cooked a pregnant bird!” At the reality of this horrifying news,
my sister started to cry.
It took the family two hours to convince her that turkeys lay eggs!

When everyone goes around to say what they are thankful for, say, “I’m thankful I didn’t get caught!” and refuse to say anything more. During the dinner, turn to your mom and say, “See, mom?  I *told* you they wouldn’t notice the turkey was beyond the expiration date!  You were worried about nothing!”

I love Thanksgiving turkey… it’s the only time in Los Angeles that you see natural breasts.
Arnold Schwarzenegger

Some neighbors of my grandparents’ gave them a pumpkin pie as a holiday gift. As lovely as the gesture was, it was clear from the first bite that the pie tasted bad. It was so inedible that my grandmother had to throw it away. Ever gracious and tactful, she still felt obliged to send the neighbors a note. It read “Thank you very much for the pumpkin pie. Something like that doesn’t last very long in our house.”

via Funny True Thanksgiving Stories | Gather.

“I dropped the turkey after rubbing olive oil all over it. I rinsed it off, rubbed [the oil] on again, and cooked it. Didn’t tell anybody for 10 yrs…just told them last year. Oh well, it didn’t kill anybody or make them sick, lol!”Read more: Thanksgiving Stories – Funny Thanksgiving Disaster Stories – Redbook